Bride Side Vol: 13: 'A great day by any definition...The best day by mine'

Guest Groom: Liam (of Emily & Liam) of Annapolis, Maryland*
Connection to Maine: Bride's homestate
Wedding Date: July 19, 2008
Wedding Location: Church ceremony in York, Maine and tented reception at the Greystone Manor in Cape Neddick, Maine
Guests invited: 252
Guests attending: 184 (120+ of them from out-of-state)
*Click here for coverage of Emily and Liam's wedding on the blog, here for their slideshow and here for Emily's fantastic entry to the Bride's Side

You always hear people say, "It was the best day of my life" when describing their wedding day, but I guess I never truly believed them. Sure, weddings are fun, but the best day, out of all the days in your life? Surely unlikely. When people get married they're old enough to have lived many thousands of days (I hope), and continue to enjoy many thousands of days after the wedding. The time that makes up that one day is a drop in the bucket of life. Right? I mean, it sounds like something husband says fishing for brownie points from wife. Picking that one day you joined her out of the thousands- how can you lose with that one? Smart play guys.

But... now I'm a believer. I wish someone had drilled through my thick skull that it was going to be the best day of my life, and you should prepare yourself as such. As an ADD groom with a big family and an out of state wedding to help plan, I was overwhelmed and disillusioned by the whole wedding planning bonanza. I let some of that malaise carry over into my wedding day expectations. Don't do that. You will be gravely mistaken.

There is only one day in your whole life when all of your best friends and closest family gather in one place to celebrate that you and the love of your life have found each other. One day. The only day that college buddies, uncles, neighbors, your grandmother, your wife's grandmother, and people you have never met will raise a glass, and cut a rug together in name of your eternal happiness. That, is a great day by any definition. The best day by mine.

Seeing you've already seen many of Emily and Liam's wedding images on the blog, I thought I'd compliment this post with some of my favorite spreads from their signature album:



















Biggest planning surprise: How much goes into a wedding! I knew it was going to be quite an undertaking, but I never could have imagined... good thing my fiancée was organized.

Favorite wedding planning resource: My fiancée, she is an amazing planner and our wedding was her "tour de force". (Editor's note: Liam's fiancée turned wife Emily became a nationally known blogger on WeddingBee.com during her planning and was an inspiration to thousands of other couples as well.)

I wish I'd spent more time: Thinking about all the great things that were to happen on my wedding day instead of dwelling on potential pitfalls.

I wish I'd spent less time: Driving all over New England looking at venues- but it was totally worth it.

I wish I had: Gotten a haircut before I left for Maine, I stupidly assumed that I'd have time to go to a barber in the two days I had before the wedding. Duh! Thankfully, I was able to get a quick trim from the woman doing the girls' hair on the morning of our wedding.

I wish I hadn't: Let the cake disappear before I could have more of it. It was damn good and I only got the bite Emily fed to me.

I am glad I/we did: Walk into a Chinese Karaoke Bar at midnight the night of the wedding. We were absolutely starved and was so memorable to be serenaded by complete strangers after spending the day among friends and family.

I am glad we didn't: Have a total breakdown when a (very severe) storm knocked out the power and nearly blew our guests into the Atlantic surf.

Favorite wedding moment: When the power went out, the cake almost fell over, the lawn furniture blew away, hail dotted the grounds, and I saw the band pour water out of their speakers, I looked around and saw that people were smiling, laughing, enjoying themselves, and that my wife was still glowing just as brightly as ever. I'll never forget that moment of relief and peacefulness.

Detail that was worth it: Signature Drinks- those Dark n' Stormies were a hit! Which explains a lot about our guests' post-reception antics.

Detail that was a waste: We rented extra lights because we were paranoid about the lighting being too weak in the tent- they were totally unnecessary and kept tripping the circuit breaker.

Best wedding splurge: The Band. They rocked the house/tent/swampy grass patch.

Best wedding steal: The lanterns with LED lights that we put together ourselves- we spent $250 on them and the rental company wanted over $5k!

My best advice is: Listen closely to what your partner wants, that can go a long way towards a smoothly planned wedding. Do your best to make your wedding great, but if you can't pull off what you've dreamed of: don't worry. Your family and friends are what make the wedding- everything else is a bonus.

And, for a bit of shameless self-promotion, what was your favorite part about working with Samantha Warren Weddings: What a hard worker! In spite of less than ideal conditions, Sam was all over the place. She was everywhere! Crawling on the slick rocks, navigating the perilously packed dancefloor, braving the rowdy, bar-plundering crowd... all for the perfect shot (of which there were more than plenty). BRAVO.

Read Past Bride's Side Posts:
-Vol.1: 10 tips for making the "Best Day of Your Life" just that
-Vol. 2: 'Remember you are starting a life together'
-Vol. 3: Go green, but stay real
Vol.4: If I knew then, what I know now
-Vol.5: 'Try not to over think things- hard as it may be'
-Vol. 6: What to expect when you are unexpecting
-Vol. 7: 'It's all about being your collective selves'
-Vol. 8: 'A celebration of the people who shaped us'
-Vol. 9: 'Experience is the best wedding planner'
-Vol. 10: 'I would do it all again tomorrow, if I could...'
-Vol. 11: Make it a family affair
-Vol. 12: 'Our ultimate goal was to throw a great party'

Sustainability (aka green is good and gold)

Each weekday, I receive a round-up of the day's business news headlines from Mainebiz, a statewide business paper I subscribe to, and sometimes freelance for (click here to read the piece I wrote for them last spring about how the recession might impact Maine's wedding industry). In honor of Earth Day, Mainebiz posed an eco-question to the readers of this Daily briefing: Has the recession made it more difficult for your business or employer to pursue green business practices?

This got me thinking about the ways Samantha Warren Weddings has (or hasn't) become more environmentally-friendly this past year. I think it's misleading to assume that going green means you have to give more green. As I discovered when considering my own business practices, what's best for the planet is often pretty darn good for my clients as well! What's more is that many of the actions I've taken to make Samantha Warren Weddings more efficient as a small business have serendipitously lessened my impact on my bottom line and on the environment! Those two tracks are not mutually exclusive and continuing to insist that they are will only prevent us from truly embracing sustainability.

While our branding colors may be lavender and white, here is a sampling of how Samantha Warren Weddings (in addition to working from a home office, recycling, using recharegable batteries, etc.) has gone green (and why it's good for you):

•I offer completely paperless booking thanks to ShootQ, an online studio management program that allows clients to book their package, fill out their contract, pay their retainer and share their wedding day details with me all electronically. In addition to allowing me to be more organized and confident that payments are where they are supposed to be, this was a move I made to streamline and simplify the booking process for my clients, about 80 percent of whom live out of state. And never again does a potential client loose-out on having me photograph their wedding because their contract got lost in the mail!

•The album company I use to print my signature albums offers vegan cover options featuring faux leather and suede materials that look and feel as good as the real thing. And albums are always shipped in green packaging, wrapped in paper made from recycled pineapple leaves and ribbon made from beautiful recycled mulberry leaves (sounds weird, but anyone who has received an album from me knows how fantastic it looks).

•I shot my first green wedding this past fall at the Asticou Inn in Northeast Harbor and worked with Sara and Dean (the green couple) to educate other couples and vendors about eco-friendly weddings. This was done through a trendspotting entry on the blog about the growing green wedding movement; a Bride's Side post by Sara on realistic ways to go green; a spotlight on green weddings in the trends section of the 2009 Real Maine Weddings magazine (see item 3 on page 33); and a Real Green Weddings feature on the Green Bride Guide. As a way of celebrating Sara and Dean's commitment, I offered them complimentary rehearsal dinner coverage. You can see the slideshow of that emotional rehearsal and their wedding day and get some easy (and often cost-effective) ideas for your own green wedding here.

•Every photograph I take is digital and instead of paper proofing, I post all edited images online for client (and friends and family review) via Pictage. This saves me (and thus my client) money for printed proofs as well as the time for me to order them and my clients to sort through and then store them. Clients can then decide from there what prints, albums and other products they'd like to order, ensuring nothing that is printed will not be admired and adored.

•And finally, once a month, we have Green Clean Maine, a local earth-friendly cleaning service, come work their magic on our house/home office. In between cleanings, we use Mrs. Meyers Clean Day Home biodegradable lavender line to clean our home. In fact, their colors were in part what inspired Samantha Warren Weddings new look last summer! And, I especially recommend the dryer sheets (hint- once they've done their duty in the dryer, use them to dust with)!

As always, I am always eager to learn more ways to lessen my impact on the environment and promote sustainability. If you have any suggestions or stories to share about how you've gone green, please leave them in the comments section. And if you are planning on having a green wedding, please contact me! Anyone who books a green New England wedding with me through the end of May will receive a complimentary engagement session in support of your sustainability commitment. Go green. Save green.

(Image above from Katie and Andy's Searsport Maine wedding in the fall of 2007. Not a green wedding, but they do lots to support sustainability and I am loving the beautiful green leaves in this image. Plus they referred me to my green couple, Sara and Dean.)

Nothing focuses like a Nikon

Nine. I think that's how many days we lasted keeping the dogs off the new couches we bought when we moved to Portland last summer. They put the love in loveseat.

And so we surrendered, as we so often do when it comes to these hairy little heathens who make us laugh at least 117 times per day, because while couches can be cleaned (though we they never will) or replaced, Alder and Nikon cannot be.

When I used to work in an office, I'd often wonder what the dogs did all day. Sometimes, there were clues. Like the time a gnawed plastic bottle formerly filled with Women's-One-A-Day multivitamins was found on the floor, alongside one of no less than 19 piles of orange puke strategically spewed around the house (not on her bed of course) and a very sheepish looking Alder. Or when Nikon -clearly frustrated that his lack of opposable thumbs made book reading rather difficult- plastered our living room with pages shredded from the books Kyle and I had just given each other for Hanukkah (one each night- that's a lot of pages).

Other times, it's not so obvious, and that makes us very, very nervous.

But the benefit of working for the most part from a home office means I get to see how their schedule unfolds. How Alder moves around the house following the sun and how Nikon...ohh, Nikon.

He's recently become obsessed with squirrels, and spends his day racing from window to window, where he'll stand sentry sometimes for hours, his droopy lips draped over the sill, his eyes darting about the lawn seeking the slightest sight of gray. They taunt him, nibbling their nuts just feet from them, and that makes his tail twitch with such fervor, I fear he's having a seizure.

It's sad really. And what he'll do if he actually ever catches said squirrel is unimaginable, but two weeks ago Tuesday, we almost found out. He was tearing after one, only to be intercepted by our neighbor's Subaru, which he ran into with such force, he left a dent in it before flipping over the hood and landing in a heap on the pavement. Surprisingly, he was unharmed, a bit ashamed for sure but besides letting out an angry bark of frustration at her car, he walked away as if nothing had happened, never letting on that his dream had been so suddenly snatched from him.

But ever since, his squirrel searching has become more secretive, and more and more, he's started to stalk them from the safety of the couch, where at least there are pillows in place for a softer crash landing. The harder he concentrates, the harder it is for me to.

Usually, he'll just hang his head over the back of the couch, which faces the front window.


Sometimes, he'll try to hide in the shadows. I love how the sun causes him to squint here.


When a squirrel is spotted, he'll actually stand on the arm of the couch to get a better look. Admire his focus (now you know why we named him Nikon).


Occasionally, he gets too frustrated to take it, and rolls over with regret.

But he'll soon be back, alert as ever with his whiskers primed to pick up the signal of another squirrel. (Fact, if you touch a dog's whiskers, they will automatically blink.)


How do your devious dogs spend the day?

Bride's Side, Vol. 12: 'Our ultimate goal was to throw a great party'

Bridal blogger: Sarah (of Sarah and JT) of South Portland, ME*
Connection to Maine: Bride and groom's homestate
Wedding Date: October 4, 2008
Wedding Location: Ceremony and celebration in Carrabassett Valley at Sugarloaf Ski Area
*Click here to see original coverage of Sarah and JT's Sugarloaf ski area wedding, here to see their slideshow

Biggest planning surprise: How much I relied on my mom during the planning process. I don't know how some brides do everything by themselves, I was SO OVERWHELMED and pretty clueless!

(Editor's note: A bit different formatting this time. How about some of Sarah and JT's stunning signature wedding album page layouts first, and then onto the questions.)


















Favorite wedding planning resource: Those darn wedding magazines! I must have had 50 of them. I don't really think they were all that helpful and pretty much each one is the same, but I had to have them! Besides that, The Knot.

I wish I'd spent more time: getting the attendants gifts wrapped BEFORE the wedding weekend! we were late to our rehearsal dinner because we were getting the gifts together.

I wish I'd spent less time: stressing about some family issues....

I wish I had: gone to a smaller bridal boutique...designer labels aren't everything, there were a few important details on my dress and undergarments that were NOT taken care off and I attribute that to an over booked seamstress...

I wish I hadn't: been late to the ceremony! I really should have started getting ready earlier in general, but those pesky buttons on my dress caused quite a problem! I would have loved to have time to just soak it all in rather then racing to the chapel, but we made it!

I am glad I/we did: have 3 different cakes! Yum.

I am glad we didn't: do extravagant center pieces, nobody notices them, including yourself, you're never at your table!

Favorite wedding moment: Being announced into the reception and our first dance. Absolutely the best ~5 mins of my life...

Detail that was worth it: the band!!!! Our ultimate goal was to throw a great party and our band was the perfect match for our boisterous party people!

Detail that was a waste: the top shelf liquor. Open bar was plenty, allowing top shelf liquor nearly cleaned my mom out (don't blame us! it was her idea!)

Best wedding splurge: Again, the band! (Editor's note: I can attest to this- they were amazing. As I said on my blog post-wedding, "literally the most 'insane' (to quote a guest), energetic and entertaining band I've ever seen perform.")

Best wedding steal: It was important to us that our guests not spend a lot on hotel rooms. Off season at Sugarloaf's Grand Summit provided perfect pricing.

My best advice is: This might be common knowledge but make sure somebody in your wedding party (or family or just somebody you trust) is in charge of your gift table. Some of our cards went "missing" after the "event planner" assured us that SHE was always in charge of transferring the gifts from reception to the newly wed suite. She no longer works at that venue.

And, for a bit of shameless self-promotion, what was your favorite part
about working with Samantha Warren Weddings: I truly could NOT have been happier with any other photographer. I'm not big on pictures of myself, in fact I can say I was dreading the picture process. Not only did she put me at ease by being friendly and professional but she was FUN and HELPFUL. Gasp! Sam had great ideas and kind words of wisdom throughout my wedding day. I felt her presence was calming but very enthusiastic and absolutely added to our whole experience. Sam's passion and devotion to her job is apparent from the very first moment you meet her. You'll feel as though you are the most special people on the most special day ever to have occurred! She'll laugh with you and cry with you and through all that present you with fabulous, fun and classic pictures!

Read Past Bride's Side Posts:
-Vol.1: 10 tips for making the "Best Day of Your Life" just that
-Vol. 2: 'Remember you are starting a life together'
-Vol. 3: Go green, but stay real
Vol.4: If I knew then, what I know now
-Vol.5: 'Try not to over think things- hard as it may be'
-Vol. 6: What to expect when you are unexpecting
-Vol. 7: 'It's all about being your collective selves'
-Vol. 8: 'A celebration of the people who shaped us'
-Vol. 9: 'Experience is the best wedding planner'
-Vol. 10: 'I would do it all again tomorrow, if I could...'
-Vol. 11: Make it a family affair

Susan & Jeff: Top of Sugarloaf snowy e-session

"So you finally found a way to write off a day on the slopes. Nice!"

That's how my friend Amy so perfectly put it when I posted on my Facebook page that my weekend of skiing in the sun at Sugarloaf had included an engagement session at the top of the mountain with Susan and Jeff, whose winter wedding I'll be photographing next December in Kennebunkport.

While Amy might be onto something, my picking that place for their Maine engagement photo shoot was actually a result of great timing and the fact that I pretty much get to work with the coolest couples. We'd been hoping to do a snowy shoot in southern Maine for months, but with our intense ski tour taking up our winter weekends and Susan and Jeff's own hectic hockey and ski sports schedule, we've been Volvo's with Thule racks in the night. Finally, last week, we learned we'd likely both be at Sugarloaf for Reggae Weekend. Yeah mon! (Tip: Reggae Weekend is among the best to ski at Sugarloaf- while the base area is packed, the slopes are albeit abandoned.)

We'd intended to meet for a Sunday afternoon shoot, but while taking a quick break at Bullwinkles on Saturday, we literally parked our skis right next to Susan and Jeff's. It was meant to be! We spent the rest of the day schussing through the Snowfields and busting through the bumps. Sunday found Kyle and me along with Greg (a 2007 groom turned great ski buddy) back at Bullwinkles to meet Susan and Jeff. A quick bite turned into an extended cocktail hour and goggle tanning session, and we barely made it back to the lift to get the day's final chair. As a result, we had a mere minutes at the summit before patrol began their sweep for the night. Luckily, the light was most luscious and we worked that 20 minutes for all it was worth before retiring to the Bag for some celebratory burgers.

How cool is that to be skiing with clients from the past and from the future? How stunning are Susan and Jeff? And how excited do you think I am for this wedding? Eight months to go!

Blue sky and sunshine are something we haven't seen enough of lately and something that we won't see much next December when Susan and Jeff get married after dark, so I wanted to play it up in the shots.




Of course, a black and white treatment helps to create a sense of intimacy in a wide open space high atop a mountain.




This one I love! Much of the shoot was spent laughing (which I also love), but capturing these quiet moments of connection between a couple is what I am most proud of.


I know these next four will be among Susan's favorites. They are mine as well! After she first saw the images, her Facebook status was "Susan...thinks my engagement photos are symbolic of feeling on top of the world." That made my heart go pitter-patter.








On the way down Gauge, I made us all stop so I could grab a few more from the trail with the mountain in the background. These were taken with me wearing boots and as Susan reminded me, my skis! Impressive!






Congratulations Susan and Jeff, and thanks for a fun ski weekend. Just think, the next time you ski, you'll be married!