Bride's side, Vol. 2: 'Remember you are starting a life together'

Bridal blogger: Ashley (of Ashley & Greg) of Brunswick, Maine*
Wedding Date: 8.18.07
Wedding Location: Ceremony at the Falmouth Congregational Church in Falmouth, Maine and reception at the Woodlands Club, also in Falmouth
Guests invited: 150
Guests attending: 132 (30 or so from out of state, though mostly from within New England)
*You can see original coverage of Ashley and Greg's wedding here and here on the old I Do Click blog and watch their slideshow here

I wish someone had told me when I was planning our wedding to go with my gut. Do what fits you. Don't get too wrapped up into the "wedding". Remember, you are starting a life together and throughout the planning process, it's important to remember that above all else.

Because of that, there is no "right way" to do your wedding, even though it probably feels that way. The best part about the details are that they are what makes the wedding your own. And don't worry, no matter how much you keep everything in perspective, it will become a second job.

Personally, I was really helped in the days leading up to my wedding by the nicest email from a married friend. I had asked her for some last minute advice, and this is what she sent:

- "Wrap your bridesmaid gifts (and groomsman gifts, for that matter) in advance.
- A week or so beforehand, go through your wedding checklist from either Martha Stewart, The Knot, whatever. Write notes to yourself about who is in charge of what. For example, when you check off "event programs", write a little note that says "Aunt Sally will bring the programs to the rehearsal, Suzie and Jenny will pass them out before the ceremony." Keep it with you, even if everything is checked off, to remind yourself that you really haven't forgotten anything.
-Delegate tasks to people you can trust. They will do it. You don't have to do it all.
- Write EVERYTHING down for the venue. Everything. Even if it seems like common sense. Because it may not be your event contact who is doing the brunt of the setup, it will most likely be the event staff.
- If your rehearsal is the night before, don't drink. Seriously. And if you have to drink, keep it to a social drink or two.
- Go to bed early and get some sleep the night before
- Do something nice for your fiancé the morning of the wedding - have a small gift delivered or send a little note over to him to let him know how much you love him and how excited you are to marry him today.
- If you're going to drink beer at the reception, drink it out of a glass.
- I know I've told you this a million times, but take a few minutes to hang out just with Greg sometime after the ceremony."

From this, I learned how important it is to talk to your married friends (both while planning for the wedding and after). They understand what you are going through and are happy to help!

Lastly, once you get to the day of the event, just let everything go. Whatever is going to happen is going to happen, and there's probably nothing you can do to change it. Something will definitely go wrong, but most likely no one (maybe even you!) will notice it or remember it. Relax and enjoy - you've earned it.



Biggest planning surprise: How much fun I had! It was really amazing to spend so much time on creating something that is all about you and your fiancé. It was also amazing to be able to spend so much time planning with my mom. Without her, we would have never gotten it all done AND never had some of the wonderful vender's and details. She really was my right hand throughout the entire process and I will always treasure that experience with her.



Favorite wedding planning resource: As Sam has said, looking at her blog! I can’t tell you how many wedding slideshows of hers and other vendors where I saw amazing details, programs, flowers, etc. that really were just what I was looking for (and how many times I had tears running down my cheeks that I had to hide from my coworkers during viewing!) Other then Sam’s blog, my favorite blog is Preppy Wedding. Looking back at old posts she has some amazing details, all submitted by other brides. The author also is pregnant now and has a Preppy Baby blog!



I wish I'd spent more time: Having Greg be involved more and us not worrying about what everyone else wanted for our day. I really wouldn’t change a thing and our day was fabulous but not worrying so much on what you are “supposed” to do and really sitting down with Greg about what was “us” would have been wonderful.

I wish I'd spent less time: Worrying!

I wish I had: Hired a videographer. We had a friend video the ceremony and the camera battery somehow was dying throughout the ceremony so only bits and pieces were captured. I wish I had more now; voices, songs, etc. to go with our beautiful pictures. I also wish we had had Sam at our rehearsal dinner! And, actually one more thing- order your bridesmaid dresses through J.Crew or another easy vendor. My friend just did that and the process was WAY easier and we have hardly any alterations compared to what I put my poor girls through!



I wish I hadn't: I think both of us wished we hadn’t had a sit down dinner and had done food stations like we'd originally wanted instead (remember- go with your gut). We both wish we had more time to just mingle and chat with our family and friends instead of feeling so much pressure to move from one thing to the next.

I am glad I/we did: I am so glad we were able to include our favorite bbq food (Buck’s Naked BBQ) and location in our rehearsal dinner. Though the Merepoint cottage and yacht club was a bit of a drive from our Falmouth rehearsal, having the dinner in a place that means so much to Greg (and now me!) was wonderful. Greg’s mom was amazing and the dinner was very relaxed. I really recommend having a chill cookout, bbq, or lobster bake for your rehearsal. We didn’t have to worry about how loud we were at a restaurant, the weather was beautiful, and we even had a keg on the porch. It was all very much “Greg and Ashley”.



I am glad we didn't: Make it too fancy. It was a sophisticated evening but perfect mixture of relaxed and elegant. I am also glad we didn’t have a cake! Our key lime pie was a perfect touch and something uniquely Greg and I! (Editor's note: Ashley has a serious peanut allergy, and had a difficult time finding a local cakemaker who could guarantee no cross-contamination with nut or nut oils. Homemade key lime pie was a safe and stylish compromise.)

Favorite wedding moment: The ride in the car from the church to the reception. We were in a convertible, the day was amazingly warm and sunny and we turned the music up and really just were giddy in the moment. I don’t think either of us wanted it to end, though we were so excited for the rest of the day! I will remember that feeling forever.




Detail that was worth it: The apples! Though they presented a wedding day issue (the apples the venue ordered arrived without stems- a problem when tying place cards to them!) I LOVED how the table settings looked. Also, the flowers in general for the entire day. I highly recommend my florist Flora and Fauna to everyone. The flowers were amazing! Better then I would have ever imaged and worth every penny.




Detail that was a waste: Gift bags in the hotels. We didn’t have many out of town guests and therefore didn’t have one hotel/inn that everyone stayed at. Most guests who did stay in a hotel never even got the bag delivered to them or one guest just got it on the way out! I was sad that it didn’t work out the way that I wanted and that my mom and I drove around the day before the wedding delivering bags that guests didn’t even get!

Best wedding splurge: Having a band. It really added a nice touch to the day!

Best wedding steal: Wedding shoes. Beautiful beaded sandals from the Gap! I think they were 20 dollars!



My best advice is: Priorities. Figure out what is important to you and go with that. I wish I had taken more time to set those instead of just being overwhelmed with the millions and millions of choices and decisions.

And finally (please excuse the shameless self-promotion), what was your favorite part about working with Samantha Warren Weddings: Working with Sam was amazing. Her energy, friendly personality and style of shooting were really a perfect fit for us. I felt like I had another friend I had known forever with me, and it was especially nice as a younger bride to have someone who knew what to expect throughout the day-, as my bridesmaids and I were pretty clueless! That experience and perspective was exactly what I needed. She even kept my lip-gloss in her camera bag so I would have it close by whenever I needed it! Sam and her husband Kyle have become close friends to Greg and I who I feel very lucky to have in our lives! It would have never happened without her talent at our wedding!

Read Past Bride's Side Posts:
-Vol.1: 10 tips for making the "Best Day of Your Life" just that